i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
