break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
