so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
