He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
