My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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