Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
