Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
