used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
