I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize