Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize