5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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