i just had sex bonerless
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
