Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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