He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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