Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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