i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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