The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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