so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Randomize