Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
