what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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