What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
