i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
