hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
