i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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