____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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