Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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