Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
