the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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