just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
