you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I intend to get homeless drunk
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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