I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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