how can u be prego again
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
That's how pantless uber rides happen