I wanna bring you to show and tell
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
