we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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