if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
try to milk me bitch
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