we're chasing vodka with high fives
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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