its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
