I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
wow bdsm is so cute
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