you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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