is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
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I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
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