from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
This is the high leading the old right now
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
