I'm gonna have a badass scar
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
