every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I have tasted many bathrooms
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
