I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
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He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
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I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
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