It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
