tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
So apparently I’m into choking now
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