He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Randomize
