he wants to bone in the snuggie
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
