thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
My cat gives me a boner
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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