Texts From Last Night

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  (905): View more from Toronto

  FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.

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  (905): FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk. http://tfl.nu/mb8o
  Replies (37) Good night (1309) Bad night (5593)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class

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  (865): Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class http://tfl.nu/v047
  Replies (37) Good night (4894) Bad night (669)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating

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  (704): i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating http://tfl.nu/bh4g
  Replies (22) Good night (3579) Bad night (1397)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay

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  (513): He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay http://tfl.nu/cp59
  Replies (4) Good night (3568) Bad night (1179)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there

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  (509): he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there http://tfl.nu/265p
  Replies (7) Good night (1552) Bad night (569)
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  (818): View more from California

  The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.

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  (818): The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me. http://tfl.nu/w1nr
  Replies (18) Good night (6141) Bad night (695)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere

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  (914): Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere http://tfl.nu/1kh6
  Replies (3) Good night (1374) Bad night (542)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...

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  (403): So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine... http://tfl.nu/hixx
  Replies (12) Good night (4108) Bad night (951)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  They shoved things up my nose I feel violated

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  (740): They shoved things up my nose I feel violated http://tfl.nu/ojlg
  Replies (11) Good night (537) Bad night (1105)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.

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  (443): Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it. http://tfl.nu/cvh2
  Replies (5) Good night (910) Bad night (441)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.

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  (469): I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy. http://tfl.nu/2dh7
  Replies (7) Good night (563) Bad night (882)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.

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  (612): That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful. http://tfl.nu/5ca5
  Replies (0) Good night (320) Bad night (1060)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot

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  (267): I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot http://tfl.nu/337w
  Replies (0) Good night (528) Bad night (195)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to

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  (727): we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to http://tfl.nu/0mdu
  Replies (0) Good night (534) Bad night (228)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it

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  (301): If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it http://tfl.nu/2kea
  Replies (0) Good night (391) Bad night (99)

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