it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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