i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
