More tranny stories later!
your room smells of hookers.
And success
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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